Sunday, April 07, 2002

Ahhhh!!! My computer has randomly decided to unplug itself. Only it's not unplugged. I don't really understand it. My poor computer...
Anyway. I just got off the phone with my parents. I told my mom about possibly changing when I went to England. She was really supportive. I always forget how she is really like that. I get all nervous because I don't want to mess up their plans. But then my mom is always like, 'whatever you decide.' It's nice. It's kind of sad how much I really take them for granted.
Okay, stupid janitor man. Why must he ALWAYS be cleaning the showers when I need to be in the bathroom?!? Okay, TEN IS A BAD TIME!!! Other people need to take showers too. I feel like I'm in a competition with him. Who can get to the bathroom first? And why can't we have a female janitor? Then it wouldn't matter. But of course that would make sense, and sense is just evil.
I love my friends. For a while, they were fighting over me on my board. Peggy and Whitney are so cool. Not that the rest of my friends aren't. But they were the ones fighting on my board. If you fight over me on my board, you might get mentioned too. And Peggy's page cracks me up. So, PEggy, I'm glad you are enjoying my corruption to feminazi. Of course, you and Whitney are also the one's who make me watch things with cute boys in them. Though I still say anyone who is like fourteen can't be cute to me, even if he does sing and dance.
I'm going to a murder mystery party tonight! YAY! Even if it is Emily and her close friends that I don't really know. I'm playing a boy. But I can't. Not really. Damn my girlish figure. And I don't have any boy pants. oh well. It's not like I'm actually trying to fool anybody.
You know what I find odd? I can't just cry. Okay, I sometimes have break-downs, but not very often. I can feel when I need to cry; my heart feels bruised. But I have to make myself. It's like picking at a scab. I know all the things that make me sad and I think about them. A lot. And when I get tired of crying, I resupress all the tears. Some how this doesn't seem healthy....

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